


Drown It Out

by God217



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: BIG ASS TRIGGER WARNING, Character Death, Disfiguration, Suicide, Yo this is dark af, have fun, i take no responsibility for any trauma received lmao, just a lot of bad things happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-18
Updated: 2018-11-18
Packaged: 2019-08-25 16:09:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16663951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/God217/pseuds/God217
Summary: My entry for a Halloween event exclusive for members of GBH, a group on AminoPrompt Words:Rika, Wave, 260It said Rika and wave what did you expect me to doThe rules said no death but idk this isn't what I intended to write so umOops??Long story short I just accidentally murdered like two people this is why we can't have nice things.Please enjoy





	Drown It Out

What would happen if she did what he’d said she’d done?

Not like anybody but him would even know.

If they ever found her body, nobody would be surprised.

And if they didn’t, nothing would change.

Of course, they’d seen her once, which had been a mistake on her part, but maybe they’d come to believe it had just been a mirage.

Nothing but a figment of their imagination, like she’d never truly been there.

She should’ve never gone back.

She’d killed the child.

The sweet little boy she’d thought she’d saved, she’d ruined him.

She’d destroyed him, but she hadn’t known. Hadn’t listened to the truth, until now, it was too late.

He was dead, because of her.

If she hadn’t tried to help him, he’d be alive.

All of the Believers, they’re now homeless and lost, because she’d promised to protect them, and failed.

And V, her sun, he’d left her.

Left her for the very girl she’d intended to replace him with.

So she’d tried one last time to bring the party guests to the new Mint Eye she’d create, but none other than Yoosung had prevented her.

Yoosung, her wonderful cousin, who’d once looked up to her as if she were his guiding light in person.

Hated her.

They all hated her.

And Luciel, how could she ever look him in the eyes?

What would stop her from doing what V had always told them?

What would stop her from taking the plunge?

She could walk straight up to the very cliff he’d pointed out, and just end it.

Just let herself fall.

Let the ocean take her.

What would happen if she just let go, let the waves wash over her, cover her.

Have the water tuck her in as if it were a blanket, softly putting her to sleep.

She wouldn’t be missed.

Surely they’d all be glad if she were gone now.

She’s killed Ray, she’s killed Saeran…

And almost V too.

This world is no place for her devil.

It never was.

And what use is there living in a world where she would never be accepted?

All she’d ever been was hated, she’d just been denying it.

Even V had never loved her.

She’d never been worthy of it.

But she could save them, she could truly save them.

Save them from herself.

She could drown her devil in the ocean.

But would her devil allow her to drown it?

The one thing keeping her is the thought that, if she were gone, the dark would remain.

The dark would leave her useless body, and find somebody new.

As long as it’s her, she can contain it.

But she can’t know if it will die with her.

So she waits.

A week.

A month.

She remains in Seoul at first, hiding in plain sight, but checking into hotels under a false name.

Three months.

Five.

Nobody ever comes looking for her.

Nobody finds her.

Eventually she gets a small apartment a few miles south, distanced from the city. She didn’t like it there anyway, too crowded.

She’s missed the Mint Eye, how secluded it was.

Being surrounded by bad people is just… too tempting.

She’s too tempted to hurt them.

They deserve it.

And she can’t save anyone either.

Six months pass, then eight.

Slowly she becomes content with her newfound solitude.

When she’s all alone she can pretend it never happened.

Sometimes.

But precisely two hundred and sixty days after the destruction of the Magenta, she has a dream.

In her dream, she is the savior again.

And Ray is with her.

Standing next to her, timid and obedient as ever.

And he asks her, what she would like him to do.

As if nothing had ever changed.

Tears form in her eyes as she looks at the boy, looks at him full of disbelief, because she never expected to see him again.

There are no words she can find for an answer.

What does she want him to do?

She doesn’t have any more orders.

She just wants him to live.

His name leaves her lips, a mere whisper, as she reaches out for his sleeve.

She needs to touch him.

To feel him, to know he’s real.

To let him know she was wrong.

But then he finally turns to her, and her arm freezes in midair.

It’s not Ray.

He isn’t Ray.

He’s nothing but a trace of him, disfigured beyond recognizion.

His face is but a hole, black and charred, red flesh and white bones poking through where his eyes have once been.

His clothes and hair are in perfect condition, as if he’s changed into clean ones after dying, and brushed it for hours.

But his skin is gone, all burned off of him.

“I don’t know what to do,” he whispers, she can’t even make out where his words are coming from, can’t bear to look at where his mouth has once been.

But she can hear the tremble in his voice.

He’s lost without her, but she can’t give him orders any longer.

But he can’t live without her doing so.

As if he knew her thoughts, he begins to cry, tears forming in empty sockets, and he reaches out for her for comfort, but she can’t.

Can’t take it any longer.

She turns to run, to escape somehow, pretend it never happened, but suddenly she’s surrounded by cloaked figures. All of the Believers are closing in on her, cornering her, not letting her flee.

And Ray is in their center.

Asking why she abandoned them.

Betrayed them.

Why she didn’t save them.

She wakes up in cold sweat, tears covering her face as she shivers, not even trying to keep the sobs from escaping her.

She did all that.

Ray was right.

She did it.

And she’s tried for so long to live with it, to deny it.

But she can’t.

All she’s ever done was lie, fake herself.

The truth?

She’s never been strong.

She’s not.

Her devil is so much stronger than her, and as long as she lives, it won’t ever stop tormenting her.

For so long now she’s kept it hidden again.

But it doesn’t like to be hidden.

And she doesn’t like to cause pain.

So what choice does he have?

There’s only one option left.

And finally, she accepts it.

Maybe going so close to V’s house is risky, she realizes, as he might see her, and it’s better if he doesn’t, if they never meet again.

But she soon comes to find that nobody lives here anymore.

He left, abandoned it.

It’s for the best. This way, she can be alone.

But she wanted it to be here.

It just felt like the right place.

She doesn’t even remember the way, she only finds herself standing at the edge, not knowing how she got there.

As if the world has already blurred away, erasing her from memory.

As if she already ceased to exist.

Maybe she already doesn’t.

Maybe she’s just an empty shell, occupied by darkness.

But she owes this to Ray.

Is this how he felt?

Like there was nowhere he belonged.

Because she’d taught him he didn’t.

And trapped him.

And he’s never left the building.

She owes him.

Maybe she’ll meet him again now.

She doesn’t want to. She’s too much of a coward to face him.

But he deserves it.

They all will be better off.

Her devil will be gone, she’s come to realize, that each person has one of their own, and hers just happened to be stronger.

And it’s not about her.

She’s insignificant compared to the vastness of the world, even her deepest darkness doesn’t make a difference in the end.

Somebody else will always be there.

Suffering will never end.

Whether she exists or not makes no difference.

So she has no reason to stay.

Somehow she’s expected it to be quick, and soft, but it’s not.

The waves are violent and merciless, thrashing her around like a rag doll, as if they were purposely trying to make her suffer one last time.

They’re just like she used to be, that’s her last thought.

It’s a very fitting end.

She never knows whether she drowned first, or hit her head on the rocks.

But when someone finally comes to find her, she’s smiling.

At last, the devil has left.

She’s free.


End file.
